Truth fears no questions

I earlier wrote how being honest and getting over the temptation to lie can go a long way in making you a good human.

But it is easier said than done.

* To start being honest we need to think honestly. Several times we decide on matters without giving it a thought. What you have no first hand knowledge about the matter we should not let it come out of our mouths.

* When we start being honest we should be honest about the smallest things. This is easy and helps you getting into the habit of being honest. Try to answer honestly when asked simple questions. I have seen people give dishonest answers to the most innocuous questions like "did you have your lunch". Now if you did not like it or did not get the time to have it where is the harm in saying "No". Why lie and feel guilty about such a small issue.

* Being honest at all times is not practical, some people say. No it is not "being honest" that is impractical but not being sensitive while being honest that is harmful. Honesty should be practiced in a way that it is not be misinterpreted as criticism or a lack of support.

* It's very tempting to tell a "white lie" when dealing with sensitive loved ones but you can still be honest by being creative in how you express the truth. Further, if you cannot be honest be quiet. Do not tell anything if you can do so but if pushed into a corner find out the best way to tell the truth. Wrap the potentially hurtful truth in appreciation, praise, and, if applicable, affection.

* One simple test while dealing with people is asking yourself the question "Would the listener feel bad if he came to know that i lied to him?" Most of the times the answer will be yes. If the answer is yes why lie. Still, if you cannot tell the truth do not say it at all.

Remember being honest is not easy.

* It makes you vulnerable.

* You open yourself to people,

* acknowledge your mistakes and

* give people a chance to criticize, reject and hurt you.

* And sometimes, the truth just hurts.

But also remember,

* honesty develops your character,

* It improves credibility and trust, and results in

* high self-esteem and healthy relationships.

Being honest is an ongoing process. You cannot be done with it in a day a two. It is not a task that forms your checklist. It is a challenge and success will bring long term benefits.

Nothing is as liberating as having nothing to hide. Truth fears no questions.